“Mood swings. Brain fog. Isolation, procrastination, hopelessness, anxiety. And those are just a few of the ways chronic dysregulation is kinda fucking up your life.”

Episode 299

How Chronic Dysregulation Is Affecting Your Life, Part 2

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Hello, Gorgeous Soul.

Your Mental Well-being

Alright lets talk about the mental implications of chronically dysregulated nervous system:

Difficulty concentrating, focusing, staying on task. Now, I’m not suggesting that the 8 million people I’ve seen who are getting newly diagnosed with ADHD right now isn’t real or accurate. I’m just saying, check your nerous system. When you are in a chronic state of hypervigilance or hypovigilance, you are not fully accessing your neocortex, your frontal lobe, the parts of your brain that help you think logically, problem solve, focus. Your attention is scanning. Always scanning. Always thinking about a hundred other things instead of the thing you are doing.

If you have that incessant negative chatter, highly self critical, your worthiness is dependent on other people’s approval, people pleasing, ruminating. Listen, if your nervous system is looking for what’s wrong all the time, it’s not going to be hyping you up. It’s not going to be questioning your thoughts of “I’m not good enough” it’s like YES, dude, you need to change eveyrthign about yourself. Worst hype squad ever.

Swinging moods. In a dysregulated state, you are in reaction mode, not reflect and think about it and take a deep breath before you respond. It’s like trigger – react, before you even know it’s happening.

Brain fog. Similar to lack of focus. Chronic dysregulation is exhausting. EXHAUSTING. Again, those hormones like cortisol and adrenaline are meant to be for sprinting, not running a marathon, so that foggy confusion is a result of a tired overall system.
Have a very hard time just making a decision. Quick reason: when your nervous system is always looking for what is wrong/dangerous, then every decision you make will be heavily questioned, interrogated for why it’s the wrong decision. It’s trying to keep you safe, but instead it’s keeping you stuck.

Your Emotional Well-being

Decreased resilience. Again you aren’t just physically tired. You are soul tired. And when you are chronically reacting to things happening from that dysregulated state, you are overwhelmed. It’s very hard to bounce back when you are that dysreguated all the time.

Hard time controlling your emotions OR accessing them. You know how when you haven’t gotten enough sleep you feel like it’s hard to control your emotions? You cry easier or you snap at everything or maybe you shut down hard? And maybe you just kind of feel this now in general? That’s chronic dysregulation, baby. This doesn’t change until you purposefully, actively, intentionally build your calm AF skills.

Procrastination. Yup. Nervous system baby. Because when your entire system is exhausted it is all about AVOIDING being triggered if at al possible. If I never start this thing, then I can’t fail, right? I will avoid feeling shame or embarrassment. If I never start this project, then my incessant negative chatter won’t have the opportunity to tell me how much I suck.

Codependnet relationships. Those attachment styles? Anxious attachment, avoidant: THANKS chronic dysregulation.
Emotional eating, emotional eating, numbing out, doom scrolling, dissociating.

Rigid mindset: just be a machine and you can avoid feeling triggered.

Other ways? Struggling with boundaries. Snapping at your kids. Hopelessness. High anxiety. Isolation.

So, where to start?

I know it feels like everything can be traced right back to a dysregulated nervous system. Because it can be. Because that’s the foundational piece. A chronically dysregulated nervous system is basically going to negatively impact every single aspect of your life, UNLESS you are in an actual emergency, which would be an acutely dysregulated nervous system.

But when you’re like where should I start? Where should I start if I want to improve my physical health? Nervous system. My marriage? Nervous system. How do I stop binge eating late at night? Nervous system. How do I stop giving up what I start? Nervous system. I’m nauseous all the time. Nervous system.

I’m not saying it’s the ONLY thing. But I am saying if you’ve got any troubling issue, physical, mental, emotional, psychological, social, anything…nervous system first.

It doesn’t happen overnight but if you are actively, purposefully, intentionally, consistently, like it’s the MOST important skillset you need to learn, practicing getting into calm AF energy, a regulated nervous system every day, you will feel SO much better and things will feel SO much easier, less overwhelming.

– Kristen

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